Squad
2014/2015
2. David Gibson (RB/LB)
Age: 25
From: Gateshead
Pld: 14 Ass: 3 Gls: 0 MOM: 1
Gibson was originally signed as a central midfielder but it soon came to the manager's attention that he had no idea what he was doing. The new signing begged John for another chance and was slotted into left back for the second game of the season. Gibson went on to pick up the MOM award (something he hasn't done since) and the rest was history. Since then he has proved to be the Crab's very own Paul Dummet, giving a consistent mediocre performance at either left back or right back
Age: 25
From: Gateshead
Pld: 14 Ass: 3 Gls: 0 MOM: 1
Gibson was originally signed as a central midfielder but it soon came to the manager's attention that he had no idea what he was doing. The new signing begged John for another chance and was slotted into left back for the second game of the season. Gibson went on to pick up the MOM award (something he hasn't done since) and the rest was history. Since then he has proved to be the Crab's very own Paul Dummet, giving a consistent mediocre performance at either left back or right back
Top scorers:
Dalman 10
Adil 6
Daughtry 6
Swindells 4
Wood 3
Top appearances:
Coventry 15
Gibson 14
Sam 13
Hutchings 12
Garvin 12
Dalman 10
Adil 6
Daughtry 6
Swindells 4
Wood 3
Top appearances:
Coventry 15
Gibson 14
Sam 13
Hutchings 12
Garvin 12
Top assists:
Dalman 6
Swindells 5
Wood 4
Weyell 4
Daughtry 4
Top MOM:
Pearson 2
Dalman 2
Beninho 2
Adil 1
Hutchings 1
Dalman 6
Swindells 5
Wood 4
Weyell 4
Daughtry 4
Top MOM:
Pearson 2
Dalman 2
Beninho 2
Adil 1
Hutchings 1
3. John Martin (LB)
Age:
From: London
Pld: 9 Ass: 0 Gls: 0 MOM: 0
One of, if not THE most experienced Crab in the squad, John has saw his game time cut short due to injuries and marriages (only one marriage). John is known as the gaffer to most but he also brings solidarity to the back four when playing left back or even filling in as goalkeeper.
Age:
From: London
Pld: 9 Ass: 0 Gls: 0 MOM: 0
One of, if not THE most experienced Crab in the squad, John has saw his game time cut short due to injuries and marriages (only one marriage). John is known as the gaffer to most but he also brings solidarity to the back four when playing left back or even filling in as goalkeeper.
4. Adam Hutchings (CB)
Age:
From: Middlesbrough
Pld: 12 Ass: 0 Gls: 3 MOM: 1
One half of the towering centre back partnership of Guv and Ad, Adam has been solid so far whilst also chipping in with the odd goal. When either he or Garvin is missing, the team struggle defensively which is why it's vital the big man stays fit. Hutchings isn't scared to show the strikers how it's done , he showed his cool from the spot early in the season and whilst wearing the armband he thumped in a long range effort to put the Crabs ahead in another game. Whilst Hutchings is an a regular on a Sunday, he likes to bring a Ledley Kingesque mystique by refusing to train mid-week.
Age:
From: Middlesbrough
Pld: 12 Ass: 0 Gls: 3 MOM: 1
One half of the towering centre back partnership of Guv and Ad, Adam has been solid so far whilst also chipping in with the odd goal. When either he or Garvin is missing, the team struggle defensively which is why it's vital the big man stays fit. Hutchings isn't scared to show the strikers how it's done , he showed his cool from the spot early in the season and whilst wearing the armband he thumped in a long range effort to put the Crabs ahead in another game. Whilst Hutchings is an a regular on a Sunday, he likes to bring a Ledley Kingesque mystique by refusing to train mid-week.
5. Michael Garvin (CB)
Age:
From: Suffolk
Pld: 12 Ass: 0 Gls: 1 MOM: 1
Known as the Guv'nor or 'Bale' if you're Martin, Garvin is an irreplaceable rock at the back for the Crabs. Whilst primarily being known for his great reading of the game at the back, he is less known for his scouting skills. Whilst on an assignment in Holland, Garvin came back with Dalman and Gibson ready to put pen to paper. Garvin may not score high on the goals and assists table but he cleans up at the back like a Dyson rollerball.
Age:
From: Suffolk
Pld: 12 Ass: 0 Gls: 1 MOM: 1
Known as the Guv'nor or 'Bale' if you're Martin, Garvin is an irreplaceable rock at the back for the Crabs. Whilst primarily being known for his great reading of the game at the back, he is less known for his scouting skills. Whilst on an assignment in Holland, Garvin came back with Dalman and Gibson ready to put pen to paper. Garvin may not score high on the goals and assists table but he cleans up at the back like a Dyson rollerball.
6. James Coventry (CM)
Age:
From: Southend
Pld: 15 Ass: 1 Gls: 0 MOM: 0
James operates in the unsung holding role in central midfield, a position so unsung it has become very much sung to the point that it's now overhyped in modern football. Hype is not something that bothers James though who makes opposing attackers feel like they've been 'sent to Coventry' quite literally. It's been said he covers more yards than an overbooked landscape gardener and never shys away from a 50/50.
Age:
From: Southend
Pld: 15 Ass: 1 Gls: 0 MOM: 0
James operates in the unsung holding role in central midfield, a position so unsung it has become very much sung to the point that it's now overhyped in modern football. Hype is not something that bothers James though who makes opposing attackers feel like they've been 'sent to Coventry' quite literally. It's been said he covers more yards than an overbooked landscape gardener and never shys away from a 50/50.
7. Stuart Wood (RM)
Age:
From: Stoke
Pld: 9 Ass: 4 Gls: 3 MOM: 0
Although commonly thought to have been raised in Southend, Wood was born and bred in Stoke where he was originally touted as the future poster boy of darts. Stu decided to turn his back on the arrows in favour of career in the lower echelons of South West London's Sunday League and has never looked back. Wood's balance of work rate and flair make him a fans favourite at Belair Park and it also seems that it's not just the dartboard where Stu likes to hit the target, with two goals to his name already (albeit in on game) you Woodn't bet against him adding to that tally.
Age:
From: Stoke
Pld: 9 Ass: 4 Gls: 3 MOM: 0
Although commonly thought to have been raised in Southend, Wood was born and bred in Stoke where he was originally touted as the future poster boy of darts. Stu decided to turn his back on the arrows in favour of career in the lower echelons of South West London's Sunday League and has never looked back. Wood's balance of work rate and flair make him a fans favourite at Belair Park and it also seems that it's not just the dartboard where Stu likes to hit the target, with two goals to his name already (albeit in on game) you Woodn't bet against him adding to that tally.
8. Sam Pearson (CM/CB) Captain
Age:
From: Bradford
Pld: 13 Ass: 0 Gls: 2 MOM: 2
Going by the nickname 'Handsome Sam', Pearson always ensures both the team and his face are looking good on a Sunday. Whether he's putting himself forward to step between the sticks or buying flags as a Christmas Present, Sam shows why he is captain both on and off the pitch. Sam operates as a complete midfielder, stamping his authority at both ends of the field and rather than having the opponents in his back pocket, sources believe that many a mediocre Sunday League centre mid has got lost in his facial hair, never to see the light of day again.
Age:
From: Bradford
Pld: 13 Ass: 0 Gls: 2 MOM: 2
Going by the nickname 'Handsome Sam', Pearson always ensures both the team and his face are looking good on a Sunday. Whether he's putting himself forward to step between the sticks or buying flags as a Christmas Present, Sam shows why he is captain both on and off the pitch. Sam operates as a complete midfielder, stamping his authority at both ends of the field and rather than having the opponents in his back pocket, sources believe that many a mediocre Sunday League centre mid has got lost in his facial hair, never to see the light of day again.
9. George Dalman (CF)
Age:
From: Birmingham
Pld: 10 Ass: 5 Gls: 10 MOM: 2
Scouted by Garvin in Holland, Dalman has hit the ground running, or should I say strolling as the Brummy Berbatov seems to effortlessly glide past his opponents and pass the ball into the back of the net. Being raised in a no-go Islamic state like Birmingham (courtesy of Fox News) has obviously toughened up the skilful striker as he has never been afraid to mix it with the centre backs. With seven goals already this season, there is no reason why the number nine can't hit at least fifteen by the summer, no pressure.
Age:
From: Birmingham
Pld: 10 Ass: 5 Gls: 10 MOM: 2
Scouted by Garvin in Holland, Dalman has hit the ground running, or should I say strolling as the Brummy Berbatov seems to effortlessly glide past his opponents and pass the ball into the back of the net. Being raised in a no-go Islamic state like Birmingham (courtesy of Fox News) has obviously toughened up the skilful striker as he has never been afraid to mix it with the centre backs. With seven goals already this season, there is no reason why the number nine can't hit at least fifteen by the summer, no pressure.
10. Ali Dewji (RB/LB/CB)
Age:
From: London
Pld: 11 Ass: 1 Gls: 0 MOM: 0
If you're going to be a full back sporting the famous number 10 shirt then you're gonna have to be a character and Dulwich's very own Jordan Beaufort, Ali Dewji, does not disappoint. Pulling up ten minutes late in one of his numerous cars, Ali would be under more scrutiny if his son didn't provide 50% of the Crabs' fanbase. The local lad was fashionably late to the first game of the season only to handle the ball and give away a penalty. Ali still had the audacity to nutmeg a Turkish winger shortly after setting the tone for what has been eventful season. OPTA have revealed that Ali's mouth has covered more yards than his feet this season with his infamous arguments providing entertainment for both sides alike. 'I'm going to do a lot of running this game' Ali once proudly announced showing that even in 2nd gear he can give the opponents a morning they'll not recover from for a good while.
Age:
From: London
Pld: 11 Ass: 1 Gls: 0 MOM: 0
If you're going to be a full back sporting the famous number 10 shirt then you're gonna have to be a character and Dulwich's very own Jordan Beaufort, Ali Dewji, does not disappoint. Pulling up ten minutes late in one of his numerous cars, Ali would be under more scrutiny if his son didn't provide 50% of the Crabs' fanbase. The local lad was fashionably late to the first game of the season only to handle the ball and give away a penalty. Ali still had the audacity to nutmeg a Turkish winger shortly after setting the tone for what has been eventful season. OPTA have revealed that Ali's mouth has covered more yards than his feet this season with his infamous arguments providing entertainment for both sides alike. 'I'm going to do a lot of running this game' Ali once proudly announced showing that even in 2nd gear he can give the opponents a morning they'll not recover from for a good while.
11. Chris Taylor (LM/LB)
Age:
From: Manchester
Pld: 11 Ass: 1 Gls: 0 MOM: 1
Taylor has provided energy on the left hand side both from the start as well as when coming off the bench to give the game a new lease of life. Taylor may see himself as a winger but he proved he is just competant in a defensive role on a couple of occasions. The little bearded Mancunian may have been frustrated with spells stood on the sideline but with his unquestionable work rate and ability combined with his versatility, he's going to make it hard for the gaffer to leave him out. Taylor took on the mantle of 'club joker' when he suggested his team mate Gibson looked like Steven Fletcher. Gibson's confidenec has since tumbled and it's been said he is seeking counselling.
Age:
From: Manchester
Pld: 11 Ass: 1 Gls: 0 MOM: 1
Taylor has provided energy on the left hand side both from the start as well as when coming off the bench to give the game a new lease of life. Taylor may see himself as a winger but he proved he is just competant in a defensive role on a couple of occasions. The little bearded Mancunian may have been frustrated with spells stood on the sideline but with his unquestionable work rate and ability combined with his versatility, he's going to make it hard for the gaffer to leave him out. Taylor took on the mantle of 'club joker' when he suggested his team mate Gibson looked like Steven Fletcher. Gibson's confidenec has since tumbled and it's been said he is seeking counselling.
12. Ben Daughtry
Age:
From: London
Pld: 10 Ass: 4 Gls: 6 MOM: 2
Little Ben or Beninho as he's known in his spiritual homeland brings a bit of much needed Samba flair to the pot holes of Belair park on a Sunday. Missing for the first part of the season, Beninho slotted perfectly into an already rampant Crabs team. The nippy midfielder has shown he can do a job on both flanks, down the middle and off the striker without any fuss. Like previous Brazilian exports Juninho and Romario, his low centre of gravity helps him pivot and turn his way through the congested midfield area.
Age:
From: London
Pld: 10 Ass: 4 Gls: 6 MOM: 2
Little Ben or Beninho as he's known in his spiritual homeland brings a bit of much needed Samba flair to the pot holes of Belair park on a Sunday. Missing for the first part of the season, Beninho slotted perfectly into an already rampant Crabs team. The nippy midfielder has shown he can do a job on both flanks, down the middle and off the striker without any fuss. Like previous Brazilian exports Juninho and Romario, his low centre of gravity helps him pivot and turn his way through the congested midfield area.
14. Adil
Age: 24
From: London
Pld: 10 Ass: 1 Gls: 6 MOM: 1
Christened John Sutton but given the affectionate nickname of 'Adil' by his team mates (for any referees reading), this striker combines power and flair to devistating effect. Like Adriano in his Pro Evolution Soccer 6 prime, Adil chucks defenders aside like Wreck-it-Ralph (dont laugh, that was a good film) whilst having the coolness to stay calm in front of goal. Adil won over his team mates with a brace on his debut and has continued to chip in with goals when needed although his disregard for authority found 'his' name being put in the refs book in the Seafood Derby.
Age: 24
From: London
Pld: 10 Ass: 1 Gls: 6 MOM: 1
Christened John Sutton but given the affectionate nickname of 'Adil' by his team mates (for any referees reading), this striker combines power and flair to devistating effect. Like Adriano in his Pro Evolution Soccer 6 prime, Adil chucks defenders aside like Wreck-it-Ralph (dont laugh, that was a good film) whilst having the coolness to stay calm in front of goal. Adil won over his team mates with a brace on his debut and has continued to chip in with goals when needed although his disregard for authority found 'his' name being put in the refs book in the Seafood Derby.
15. Liam Weyell
Age:
From:
Pld: 9 Ass: 4 Gls: 1 MOM: 2
Like Beninho, Liam missed the first couple of games but had no difficulty settling in to the new look Crabs side. Good in the air, tidy with the ball and strong in the challenge, Liam makes a Cruyff turn in the centre circle look like a walk in the park. Susceptible to an argument or two, the big man picked up the Crabs' first red card of the season against the 'Seafood rivals' Fish Blood Stiffs for kicking out at a poor mans Brock Lesner. If it wasn't for team mate and flat mate James Coventry, Liam could have found himself en route to Dulwich hospital. Whilst this does leave the Crabs with a suspension it shows the determination and fight that Liam brings to the team when he's available.
Age:
From:
Pld: 9 Ass: 4 Gls: 1 MOM: 2
Like Beninho, Liam missed the first couple of games but had no difficulty settling in to the new look Crabs side. Good in the air, tidy with the ball and strong in the challenge, Liam makes a Cruyff turn in the centre circle look like a walk in the park. Susceptible to an argument or two, the big man picked up the Crabs' first red card of the season against the 'Seafood rivals' Fish Blood Stiffs for kicking out at a poor mans Brock Lesner. If it wasn't for team mate and flat mate James Coventry, Liam could have found himself en route to Dulwich hospital. Whilst this does leave the Crabs with a suspension it shows the determination and fight that Liam brings to the team when he's available.
17. Ben Swindells
Age:
From:
Pld: 11 Ass: 5 Gls: 4 MOM: 0
'You clown!', 'Fuck off!', 'You're a joke ref'. It's a wonder why 'Angry' Ben Swindells is not an internet sensation by now. If the Wealdstone Raider can get to number 6 in the charts then there's no reason an auto tuned rant at a linesman from this vexed winger can't get some YouTube views. It says a lot when his team mates suggest he at least gets booked in the second half as some sort of compromise with Ben's aggressive approach. A complex Cantona-like character, Swindells already pays a suppliment on his subs to accomodate the future yellow card he'll get on the Sunday. Some argue if you were to calm the beast then he'd lose his edge and who'd argue, Ben has been getting his name written down for the write reasons of late with an impressive brace late on in 2014.
Age:
From:
Pld: 11 Ass: 5 Gls: 4 MOM: 0
'You clown!', 'Fuck off!', 'You're a joke ref'. It's a wonder why 'Angry' Ben Swindells is not an internet sensation by now. If the Wealdstone Raider can get to number 6 in the charts then there's no reason an auto tuned rant at a linesman from this vexed winger can't get some YouTube views. It says a lot when his team mates suggest he at least gets booked in the second half as some sort of compromise with Ben's aggressive approach. A complex Cantona-like character, Swindells already pays a suppliment on his subs to accomodate the future yellow card he'll get on the Sunday. Some argue if you were to calm the beast then he'd lose his edge and who'd argue, Ben has been getting his name written down for the write reasons of late with an impressive brace late on in 2014.